One day the Pope is visiting the United Kingdom. The visit is going fine, but by the final day he is getting a bit bored, so he asks a few of the Cardinals if they want to head down to the pub and tie on a couple. Well one things leads to another, and they drink a bit too much and stay too late. The Pope wakes up the next morning with a raging headache, and he looks at his watch and sees he has overslept. Unless he gets his skates on he is going miss his return flight.
So he grabs his bag and he runs downstairs, jumps in a taxi and tells the cabbie to head to Heathrow as fast as he can. But as the taxi is chuntering down the M25 the Pope is growing more and more frustrated at the speed, repeatedly looking at his watch and fretting that he will miss his flight. Eventually the Pope cannot contain his frustration, and he barks at the cabbie to just pull over on the hard shoulder.
The confused cabbie does so, and the Pope gets out walks around to the driver’s door and tells the cabbie to get into the back. Then the Pope climbs in and absolutely guns it - foot to the floor. The cab is whizzing as fast as it can go down the motorway. After he has been zooming along at 95 mph for a while the Pope suddenly hears sirens, and looking in the mirror he sees the flashing blue lights. He pulls the cab over onto the hard shoulder for the second time, and turns to the cab driver and says: “Just be cool - don’t say a word. Don’t worry - I’ll take care of this.”
The police officer walks up to the window and says to the Pope: “Can I see your driving licence please, sir?”
“Well, I’m afraid that I don’t have a driving licence, officer,” replies the Pope. “But maybe this will help?” And the Pope hands over his official Pope ID card.
The police officer looks at the card. And then he looks at the Pope. Then he looks at the card again. Then he looks at the cabbie in the back. Then he says to the Pope: “Just wait here for a moment please, sir.”
The officer returns to his car and radios his sergeant. “Sarge,” he says, “I think I may have made a mistake and pulled over someone really, really important.”
“OK,” replies the sergeant, “how important?”
“Really, really, really important!” replies the officer.
“Christ, who did you pull over?” asks the sergeant. “The Prime Minister?”
“No, more important than the Prime Minister,” he replies.
“Jesus, did you pull over the King?” he asks.
“No, more important than him,” replies the officer.
“Good Lord, man - who did you pull over who is more important than the King?”
“Well, to be honest sir - I am not completely sure who he is. But whoever he is, he has the Pope driving him around!”
