Norton Sense Of Humour

Just a note.

In Australia, two mates (or more) who enjoy each other's company will knock the shit out of each other. It's our way of saying, I like you mate.
In America, this results in a serious biff up.
In England, similar to Australia.
In Scotland, can't understand each other's accent to know if it's an argument or not.
In Ireland, too pissed to care.
In Japan, you fall on my sword then I'll fall on yours (come in spinner).
In France, did you stuff frogs legs in my peashooters you English arsehole?!!
In Europe, humour is rare.
In South Africa, don't mention the war.
In New Guinea, I'll knock your teeth out you Highland prick.
In China, don't argue with me, we're flogging this shit to the yanks whether they like it or not.
In South America, sounds good, let's make love.
1up3down, bought a beaut MkIII, call me 1down3up thanks.
pete.v, stop talking gibberish and explain to me what the hell is a MkIII starter motor?
pete.v again, how can you possible change gear when your right foot is on the right and gear lever on the left? I don't get it! Do I sit on this piece of shit backwards??
Hobot, you might want to kill yourself, but I'm going first.

Phil, whats going on in here? I thought it was an old man's home.
Jerry, get off my forum you effing dick head.
olChris, I agree with Jerry!

But we all ride Nortons, so be gentle with each other.



Just remember these rules before you post Norton information or issues.

Canadian Norton Owners ?

Torontonian said:

Canadian Norton Owners ?

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Depends on weather you are from Montreal or Quebec

Dennis

Phil, what say mate, time for a walkabout?

Torontonian said:

Canadian Norton Owners ?

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Canada?, lets get the frogs out of here, once and for all.

pete.v said:

Phil, what say mate, time for a walkabout?

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Aboriginals?, I blame Captain Cook, let's kill him again. Even though we never did.

Dennis C said:

Torontonian said:

Canadian Norton Owners ?

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Depends on weather you are from Montreal or Quebec

Dennis

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Optional.

pete.v said:

Phil, what say mate, time for a walkabout?

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Come into my topic again and I'll let your tires down Combat Wombat.
And force you to eat gecho lizards for a month!

I'm still looking for the "humour" in this thread.

Well this may not have much with Nortons, but as long as we are bashing national heritage, let us try ethnicity.

When an American gets drunk, he boasts he can beat up anyone in the bar.

When an Irishman gets drunk, he beats up everyone in the bar.

When a Frenchman gets drunk, he goes to sleep.

when a German gets drunk, he sings Deutchland Alle Uber.

When an Englishman gets drunk.....Englishmen don't get drunk....it is unEnglishlike.

When an Italian gets drunk, he makes love to a woman.

Piero! Let's you and I get two bottles of Tuscan red, hop on our Nortons, and find some women!

Roberto the Slick

Diablouph said:

I'm still looking for the "humour" in this thread.

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I'm looking for some Norton Commando content. :roll:

Looks as if this thread will soon be on its way to the 'MRD' section.

Roberto, that is interesting. I'm Australian, don't drink beer - only red wine, and I've never been really drunk. So I don't know what most Australians do when they are drunk. However I loved my father, he taught me how to handle a nasty drunk, bless his soul - I really miss him. He was a bad shit-stirrer and fighter when drunk, he had a great sense of humour when he was sober.

'Piero! Let's you and I get two bottles of Tuscan red, hop on our Nortons, and find some women!'

I was in Florence about 6 years ago. There are some really lovely ladies there - we would never go home again.

Diablouph said:

I'm still looking for the "humour" in this thread.

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I am sure it was miss titled. Should have been "Norton Sense Of Irony"

pete.v said:

Diablouph said:

I'm still looking for the "humour" in this thread.

Click to expand...

I am sure it was miss titled. Should have been "Norton Sense Of Irony"

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HD's are iron y. Nortons are soul y.

Samuel Clemens aka Mark Twain said
"The Basis of Humor is ongoing Tragedy"

Being brain injured in such a repeated manner its funny to tell difference between ongoing dream states and awake states at times, from the flash back images/sensations of life crushed distorted bleeding brains to guts and bones with reports of friends - strangers souls in last twitching gurgles while still too damn aware. I and Yates are likely equally insulted to be associated in any way but as common C-do suckers so let's boost this to happy hobot ride mood level of contemplation cheating life's fates for fun and profit-loss hobby. Last time I had kicker foot peg hook rinder calf vessel to tear and clot up embolism by full impact of cycle and ridder on it 30 sec after i had pleasant repeat conversation with my buddy Wes before we parted on last ride before winter, wonderful day, everyone grinning, no break downs no close calls, then got slight fear reaction seeing what looked like deer runing up road so far away beepped and beepped already on both brakes to stay about 30 down loose steep till spike of groin to teeth shock resolving 3 big dogs on a mission to show off whose bravest to play chicken with the cycle tires. Didn't even feel a thing till 3 hr later calf 3x's bigger throbbing choking pain with recent images still ringing of a Norton club president sent home a week after 7 leg fractures from jeep T-bone dying of traveling blood clot to his brain... So why the pissy mood attitudes on anything here among those magically left alive?

How do ya break the ice in middle of night in middle of no where in middle of arguments of an isolated on purpose family you are scratching on door for help as can't reach button or even lung function enough left to speak up or fight the biting dogs back so gun barrel in face is 1st comic relief might work out ok if waiting to tell then their prize cat still squirming is what got ya out the blue?

How do ya pack handy secure heater-equalizer lost in inner city that just lost an important sports game or alone on a table top bed looking like just cargo pile prior to a large tired couple setting up in next site over gets drunk in rages storming around hitting throwing breaking random stuff thinking no one around to witnesses such crude emotional reactive acts?

How/where to carry contraband no tax stamped liquids, pure white organic and inorganic powders or weed w/o prescriptions?

What would be your last words on a routine commuting final T-bone?
"Is the Commando ok" to get last relief "yes you were on the little 4 cylinder H--da today?

Laughing with folks vistiing from another town telling ya about high school 1st loves finally getting together with both families agreeing after apart for school, the fella on a mc the young gal just begs for a short joy ride in such great place and spring break conditions to die by deer but he didn't to carry on with?

In "Catch 22" everyone laughed their asses off at a small bomber pilot that always ended up in the water so no one would fly with him. Stopped laughing after news he made a good "crash" landing in Lake Lucerne and stuck in Switerland till end of war...

texasSlick said:

Well this may not have much with Nortons, but as long as we are bashing national heritage, let us try ethnicity.
When an American gets drunk, he boasts he can beat up anyone in the bar.
When an Irishman gets drunk, he beats up everyone in the bar.
When a Frenchman gets drunk, he goes to sleep.
when a German gets drunk, he sings Deutchland Alle Uber.
When an Englishman gets drunk.....Englishmen don't get drunk....it is unEnglishlike.
When an Italian gets drunk, he makes love to a woman.
Piero! Let's you and I get two bottles of Tuscan red, hop on our Nortons, and find some women!
Roberto the Slick

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A couple of comments....I must be French, I've seen some Germans kicked off a Swiss campsite for exactly this. piero and Roberto can I join you??
cheers
wakeup

Diablouph said:

I'm still looking for the "humour" in this thread.

Click to expand...

There isn't any.
If you don't want to be minced too, I'd get out of here real fast.

wakeup said:

texasSlick said:

Well this may not have much with Nortons, but as long as we are bashing national heritage, let us try ethnicity.
When an American gets drunk, he boasts he can beat up anyone in the bar.
When an Irishman gets drunk, he beats up everyone in the bar.
When a Frenchman gets drunk, he goes to sleep.
when a German gets drunk, he sings Deutchland Alle Uber.
When an Englishman gets drunk.....Englishmen don't get drunk....it is unEnglishlike.
When an Italian gets drunk, he makes love to a woman.
Piero! Let's you and I get two bottles of Tuscan red, hop on our Nortons, and find some women!
Roberto the Slick

Click to expand...

A couple of comments....I must be French, I've seen some Germans kicked off a Swiss campsite for exactly this. piero and Roberto can I join you??
cheers
wakeup

Click to expand...

France is in there, were you pissed last night?

hobot said:

Samuel Clemens aka Mark Twain said
"The Basis of Humor is ongoing Tragedy"

Being brain injured in such a repeated manner its funny to tell difference between ongoing dream states and awake states at times, from the flash back images/sensations of life crushed distorted bleeding brains to guts and bones with reports of friends - strangers souls in last twitching gurgles while still too damn aware. I and Yates are likely equally insulted to be associated in any way but as common C-do suckers so let's boost this to happy hobot ride mood level of contemplation cheating life's fates for fun and profit-loss hobby. Last time I had kicker foot peg hook rinder calf vessel to tear and clot up embolism by full impact of cycle and ridder on it 30 sec after i had pleasant repeat conversation with my buddy Wes before we parted on last ride before winter, wonderful day, everyone grinning, no break downs no close calls, then got slight fear reaction seeing what looked like deer runing up road so far away beepped and beepped already on both brakes to stay about 30 down loose steep till spike of groin to teeth shock resolving 3 big dogs on a mission to show off whose bravest to play chicken with the cycle tires. Didn't even feel a thing till 3 hr later calf 3x's bigger throbbing choking pain with recent images still ringing of a Norton club president sent home a week after 7 leg fractures from jeep T-bone dying of traveling blood clot to his brain... So why the pissy mood attitudes on anything here among those magically left alive?

How do ya break the ice in middle of night in middle of no where in middle of arguments of an isolated on purpose family you are scratching on door for help as can't reach button or even lung function enough left to speak up or fight the biting dogs back so gun barrel in face is 1st comic relief might work out ok if waiting to tell then their prize cat still squirming is what got ya out the blue?

How do ya pack handy secure heater-equalizer lost in inner city that just lost an important sports game or alone on a table top bed looking like just cargo pile prior to a large tired couple setting up in next site over gets drunk in rages storming around hitting throwing breaking random stuff thinking no one around to witnesses such crude emotional reactive acts?

How/where to carry contraband no tax stamped liquids, pure white organic and inorganic powders or weed w/o prescriptions?

What would be your last words on a routine commuting final T-bone?
"Is the Commando ok" to get last relief "yes you were on the little 4 cylinder H--da today?

Laughing with folks vistiing from another town telling ya about high school 1st loves finally getting together with both families agreeing after apart for school, the fella on a mc the young gal just begs for a short joy ride in such great place and spring break conditions to die by deer but he didn't to carry on with?

In "Catch 22" everyone laughed their asses off at a small bomber pilot that always ended up in the water so no one would fly with him. Stopped laughing after news he made a good "crash" landing in Lake Lucerne and stuck in Switerland till end of war...

Click to expand...

I don't have any problem being associated with you hobot.
Are you suggesting I am?
Loved Catch 22, read it twice. Movie okay, but you can't beat the original book story.