I've almost died doing what I love and know the last instants of it are pure Terror SPIKES then nothing. I sometime startle jerk shudder in bed when flash backs hit out the blue. Every moment I'm not crashing is savored but back of mind wife and I know might not return. Dying doing what Ya like best, HA just wishful thinking to rationalize its not your time yet. I still get depressed on what the deer did to me and Sir Eddie doing what we like, just tooling around behaving....