- Joined
- Jan 14, 2004
- Messages
- 2,431
Be decisive. Right or wrong, make a decision. The road is paved with flat squirrels who couldn’t make a decision.
When I get a headache I take two aspirin and keep away from children just like the bottle says.
Just once, I want the prompt for username and password to say, “Close enough.”
If you see me talking to myself, just move along. I’m self-employed We’re having a meeting
I hate it when I can’t figure out how to operate the iPad and my tech support guy is asleep. He’s 5 and it’s past his bedtime.
Today’s 3-year-olds can switch on laptops and open their favorite apps. When I was 3, I ate mud.
Tip for a successful marriage: Don’t ask your wife when dinner will be ready while she’s mowing the lawn.
If God wanted me to touch my toes, He would've put them on my knees.
Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven't met yet.
Why do I have to press one for English when you're just going to transfer me to someone I can't understand anyway?
Now, I'm wondering . . . did I send this to you, did you send it to me or have I only sent it to myself.
Your people skills are just fine. It's your tolerance for idiots that needs work.
"On time" is, when you get there.
Even duct tape can't fix stupid – but it sure does muffle the sound
It would be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes, then come out wrinkle-free...and three sizes smaller.
Lately, you've noticed people your age are so much older than you.
When I get a headache I take two aspirin and keep away from children just like the bottle says.
Just once, I want the prompt for username and password to say, “Close enough.”
If you see me talking to myself, just move along. I’m self-employed We’re having a meeting
I hate it when I can’t figure out how to operate the iPad and my tech support guy is asleep. He’s 5 and it’s past his bedtime.
Today’s 3-year-olds can switch on laptops and open their favorite apps. When I was 3, I ate mud.
Tip for a successful marriage: Don’t ask your wife when dinner will be ready while she’s mowing the lawn.
If God wanted me to touch my toes, He would've put them on my knees.
Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven't met yet.
Why do I have to press one for English when you're just going to transfer me to someone I can't understand anyway?
Now, I'm wondering . . . did I send this to you, did you send it to me or have I only sent it to myself.
Your people skills are just fine. It's your tolerance for idiots that needs work.
"On time" is, when you get there.
Even duct tape can't fix stupid – but it sure does muffle the sound
It would be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes, then come out wrinkle-free...and three sizes smaller.
Lately, you've noticed people your age are so much older than you.